Those Friends

Hi there. These are all sort of um.. Just don't read it if you don't feel like reading my rants.

I actually don't quit blogging. I just stop for a while because there's um tons of assignments and exams and stuffs waiting for me. -.-
And now I'm back with a LOT of things to blog.

No, I'm not gonna tell you the whole story because I know you'll be bored. So I summarized it to just one word : DISASTER. I don't know what's up with today but it's all like I'm running and I can't stop running even though I want to. And I'm so tired with everything. I'm so fed up with everybody's fake faces. I'm so fucked up. I'm so stupid. And I don't feel like living anymore.

I don't wanna be like this anymore. These all are just so tiring. So tiring till you think you're gonna die. The truth is that this has started since I-don't-know-when. Things suddenly gets hard and I have no one to hold on to. That's when I want somebody to hold my hand and tell me not to cry and stay strong. Because I can't stay like this any longer.

OK, I'm telling you. The thing is I've tried so hard - but not my best, I guess - to do all my assignments and homework on time. And today, is gonna be the last day I'm slacking off. I GOT 20 FOR MY BIOLOGY. There, I said it.

I know, this post is all messed up. Just so you know, I still have 50 questions of Math to do and also my Electronics test tomorrow. And also I'm not going home until 5 pm. Believe me, I am gonna die. But there are always that miracle which changes everything, aren't there?

Sometimes fate is like a small sandstorm that keeps changing directions. You change direction but the sandstorm chases you. You turn again, but the storm adjusts. Why? Because this storm isn't something that blew in from far away, something that has nothing to do with you. This storm is you. Something inside of you. So all you can do is give in to it, step right inside the storm, closing your eyes and plugging up your ears so the sand doesn't get in, and walk through it, step by step. There's no sun there, no moon, no direction, no sense of time... And once the storm is over you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won't be the same person who walked in. That's what this storm's all about.” 

Haruki Murakami - Kafka on The Shore

Because not everybody will cheer you up when you're sad or angry. Those we called "Friends" aren't really our friends. And those we called "Bestfriends" aren't our bestfriends either. Only those whom we called "Truefriends" will cheer us up, will try to calm you down, will tell us to be strong and will tell us not to cry when everything gets hard.


xx,
dying