Visited this little coffee shop called Mixed Cafe.
And ps. my legs look really ... um terrifyingly huge but long (?) lol ok stop
I know you miss me. :p
I've finished my second monthly test and I'm pretty sure I failed all subjects, except for English, Mandarin and Bahasa. You know, I kinda regret taking science but now that I think of it, I will probably regret taking social class too as I don't like those Geography or Economics or Accounting or whatsoever related to the subjects (or not). I took science class because I know I don't like those social-based issues. But I don't like science subjects as well. It's just I find it hard to perceive even the most rudimentary thing about all those subjects.
Or maybe it's only a pretext that I made up, a plethora of alibis. Just because I'm too exhausted of all these pointless lessons that I'm sure I will not need.
So life has been exhausting as you know that I made an intrepid decision to teach. I found it hard at first as I did not have much experience about teaching other than teaching my friends or sisters. I was laconic at first, explaining grammar and reading texts briefly and explaining the meaning of hard words I don't know the bahasa by gesticulating wildly, hoping they would understand, whereas my students were reticent, as I was still a newbie there. Now I am always irate because now they are being so sluggish as they keep on talking to each other, or to me for that matter, badgering me with questions unrelated to the subject they're learning about. Often I need to cajole them into doing their work. Some of them are extremely adroit while some of them are just not so bright in English. Perhaps for some teachers it's hapless when you got those students under your watch ( actually it is too, for me ), but it's my job to enhance their basic skill of English. I am vigilant that I may seem like a wicked felon to them, but like all other teachers, I just want them to be able to use English properly. (hoek HAHA ok stop)
Guess what I just made a paragraph by using 15 from 20 vocabs that I should be learning as I will have a vocab review this Thursday. You might want to ignore some of the inappropriate usage of vocab as I place them very randomly all over the paragraph. Gosh I sound like a bitch.
Anyways, not that it's important but I have this weird thing that every time I want to talk about something I just can't get it out of my mind. And it's just stuck there. That's probably why I haven't felt like blogging this whole time. Also because I'm soooo tired of school and teaching and whatsoever torture I have in my current life. And oh, the damn short movie my friends and I made for our music class. Actually I made it and my friends acted in it. It took like a month but we didn't get a really satisfying score so it's like so very pointless that I want to stab the teacher's back with a knife. Wow okay that was something. You're probably wondering where I have been. Well I've been preoccupied by these 3 guys (belle, cs, dro) who took most of my free time because they're just that awesome and fabulous and I love them and stuff oh whatever oh I mope. And hey, it's exactly a month since my last post. Typing feels weird. Yep.
And yes, this post is a very random one - I know that. But I've been crying my eyes out since yesterday because:
1. Bonnie's funeral or memorial is just so HEARTBREAKING. AND I HATE JEREMY FOR THAT.
2. FINN HUDSONNNNNNNNNNNNNN :'(
3. My life.
Now do you see why I've been grieving and crying and I just can't stop. It's really tiring to cry all day long and my eyes were swollen and got all puffy. Now I've got something to make you cry as well.
Now watch and weep. The first is Bonnie's memorial which happened to be so damn emotional that I cried right before I need to go to corpus yesterday. The second and the last are my favorite grieve songs now.
Aren't you somethin' to admire, cause your shine is somethin' like a mirror And I can't help but notice, you reflect in this heart of mine If you ever feel alone and the glare makes me hard to find Just know that I'm always parallel on the other side Aren't you somethin', an original, cause it doesn't seem merely assembled And I can't help but stare cause I see truth somewhere in your eyes I can't ever change without you, you reflect me, I love that about you And if I could, I would look at us all the time Cause with your hand in my hand and a pocket full of soul I can tell you there's no place we couldn't go Just put your hand on the glass, I'll be tryin' to pull you through You just gotta be strong Cause I don't wanna lose you now I'm lookin' right at the other half of me The vacancy that sat in my heart Is a space that now you hold Show me how to fight for now And I'll tell you baby, it was easy Comin' back into you once I figured it out You were right here all along It's like you're my mirror My mirror staring back at me I couldn't get any bigger With anyone else beside of me And now it's clear as this promise That we're making two reflections into one Cause it's like you're my mirror My mirror staring back at me, staring back at me Yesterday is history Tomorrow's a mystery I can see you lookin' back at me Keep your eyes on me Baby, keep your eyes on me You are you are the love of my life Baby you're the inspiration for this precious song And I just wanna see your face light up since you put me on So now I say goodbye to the old me, it's already gone And I can't wait wait wait wait wait to get you home Just to let you know, you are the love of my life Girl you're my reflection, all I see is you My reflection, in everything I do You're my reflection and all I see is you My reflection, in everything I do I just love this song. I swear I've been listening to it for like 13287335656356 times. And I think you should too! And the MV is like really really gooood. Gawd I love him.
xx
Yeah we got knocked out of course by a natural force
And well, we'll be swimming when it's gone
And I remember your eyes were so bright
When I first met you, so in love that night
And now I'm kissing your tears goodnight
And I can't take it, you're even perfect when you cry
Beautiful goodbye
It's dripping from your eyes
Your beautiful goodbye
It's dripping from your eyes
All the pain you try to hide
Shows through your mascara lines as they stream down from your eyes
And let them go, let them fly
Holding back won't turn back time
Believe me, I've tried
Your eyes were so bright
And I remember your eyes were so bright
And I remember your eyes were so bright
When I first met you, how in love were we that night?
And now I'm kissing your tears goodnight
And I can't take it, you're even perfect when you cry
Beautiful goodbye
It's dripping from your eyes
Your beautiful goodbye
It's dripping from your eyes
This song is so beautiful.
Maybe, just maybe, I'm finally letting you go. And it won't be because I gave in to her, it'll be because I realize that all these dramas aren't worth it. Don't worry, I had a much better life before you happen. And I will too now, without you in it. So I'll kiss you goodbye and live my life as it is.
RULES: 1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle. 2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer. 3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds. 4. Have Fun!!
I have already done this before. I just feel like doing this again. Let's see.
SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
RONAN :(
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
I'm a LADYKILLER. Errrr.
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? I like BOYFRIEND.
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? I feel like MIRROR MIRROR.
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? WHY YOU WANNA know so much? :p
WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO? BELIEVE! :)
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? I WON'T EVEN START about that!
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? That I will FIGHT FOR YOU.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? DANCE AGAIN! Heeya.
WHAT IS 2+2?
Broken Hearted </3
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIENDS? I think that they are STARSHIPS!
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Oh please. TELL ME A LIE.
WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? SO GOOD! Exactly!
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE? I think of 50 Ways To Say Goodbye to him because everything is not for forever (?)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE AT YOUR WEDDING? CATCHING FEELINGS by Justin Bieber
WHAT SONG WILL PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL? BURN IT DOWN! by Linkin Park
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? WORK HARD PLAY HARD! Oh yea!
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? My biggest fear is to TAKE YOU.
WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW? I want EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? I think of my TEENAGE DREAM.
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS? REMEMBERING SUNDAY. I like Sundays.
I know. It's totally hilarious, and not connected. But try it. It's fun! :P
It's been a rough week. And today's a rough day indeed. I'm tired, of everything. Can I stop the time? I know that I cannot. I just wish I could.
The whole September has been insane. Exams and assignments all the way. And I think I could be crazy. Yes, literally. But I still manage to go out and have fun.
Currently in love with glee's new songs. Esp. this three songs. They're on repeat. Everyday. Hehhehe
Woke up with messy hair and realize that I slept so early last night. So early = 12. Why is it early? Because 1. Yesterday was Chinese New Year's Eve. Usually I would spend the whole night watching fireworks with my sisters. And what did I do last night? I 9gaged and then peacefully slept till 8 am. Why am I being such a lazy ass?
I know now you are wondering why I always have the same background in every picture. It's because I'm too lazy taking pictures with the old camera so I just use my laptop, which I put on the table in front of my parents' bed, to take pictures.
I'm not a big fan of skirts, you know. But once I love a skirt. I'll love it till it disappears (?)
Not Over You by Gavin Degraw. It's the song we're going to use, but still not sure because I can't do the guitar. Damn it. Guitar is just so difficult. I was thinking about using Your Call by Secondhand Serenade. What do you guys think?
HI. Finally weekend. School has started since Thursday. And I just got home on Wednesday. And I'm sooooo bloody tired. Can't stop yawning. Especially when I got bored. brzzzz.
So, I haven't continued the loooooong speech I have arranged in my mind since before even Christmas. And since, well, I am me, I'm being lazy. Yes. I know. Too mean. Okay lah. I type.
Er don't know what to start. I'll just start with hm anything. I thank 2011 for all the memories. All the good and bad. All the things I learnt. All the friends I have. Everything. It was good. No, it was more than just good. It's the year when I realized it's my high school time and I shouldn't waste it by hating someone who doesn't even bother to look at me. Thanks to my friends, my family, relatives, everybody. Thanks to my classmates, we have been together no matter what, whether we dislike each other or we hate each other, it won't change the fact that we've been together all this time. And I think it's the only thing that keeps us united, until now.
Thanks to Cindy, my bestfriend slash personal adviser, who has been there for me all this time. Thanks to Jessy who has been willing to sit with me and take the risk to sometimes be crazy with me. Thanks to Jessie and Arvin, who have been the best folks ever to sit with during classes, without you two, my jhs 3 would be so cheesy. Thanks to Christine and Lydia, corpus folks, would never forget my moment at corpus. Thanks to Miss Valent, Sir Andi Botak and Miss Errie who have been teaching me English at corpus (and Sir Andi and Miss Errie will still continue teaching me English at corpus this year. :p) Thanks to the one and only Lause YC or aka Lause Juna, not only is he a great teacher (who can sometimes be a little bit cranky to us :p), he is also a friend, a great friend to us. Thanks to Junaers YC-ers who have been my new favorite clique especially when it comes to studying together every morning before exams. :p Thanks to those new friends whom I've known during 2011. And I thank 2011 for all the sweet memories, the tears, the pain.
And to A, thank you. He wouldn't see this but never mind. :p
When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
Well there's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find
Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up
I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use the tools and gifts
We got yeah we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we didn't tend
For us to work, we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn, how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I got, and what I'm not
And who I am
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
I'm still looking up
I won't give up on us
God knows I'm tough, He knows
We got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Goodnight. xx
ps. Typing this under the aircon. It's like so bloody cold and I can't even think what to type.
Need to finish this computer's assignments. The deadline is Monday, and I've just started doing the basic things. Duh, curse myself for not doing these earlier. And also curse the teacher! (lol no just kidding, happy teacher's day to all teachers in the world!)
No inspiration! My brain is er flooded!
I should stop complaining about everything! Be happy!
I know I should stop complaining. But I can't. I just can't. I complain. I say bad words. I curse people. Every bloody second of my life. Like it's in my blood. But I learn. I learn how to control myself, my emotion. And I'm still learning. So I'm sorry, if I've ever hurt your feeling. If I've ever got mad at you without any reason. If I've ever ignored you just because some stupid things. I'm a human, a person. I'm not perfect.
Heart beats fast, colors and promises How do be brave How can i love when I'm afraid to fall But watching you stand alone All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow
Time stands still, beauty in all she is I will be brave I will not let anything take away What’s standing in front of me Every breath Every hour has come to this
One step closer
I have died everyday waiting for you Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more
And all along I believed I would find you Time has brought your heart to me I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more
"You almost feel ashamed that someone could that be that important, that without them you feel like nothing."
"When it’s over and it’s gone, you almost wish that you could have all that bad stuff back so that you could have the good."
This whole week has been so tiring, hasn't it? My exams' results are gonna be so terrible. Besides, I need more sleep. My eyes are like panda's eyes now.
Hello. This is the very first real post after a long long time.
So, since this is weekend and I'll be having a one week of holiday, I'll be listing five of my favorites song at the moment. :B
Kaskade Feat. Mindy Gledhill - Eyes
Bad Meets Evil Feat. Bruno Mars - Lighters
Lady Antebellum - Just A Kiss
Lady Antebellum - We Owned The Night
The Band Perry - If I Die Young
I don't know why but I feel like I'm useless. Like there is no more thing that I can do in this life. No, I'm not thinking about suicide. Suicide is a stupid thing to do. I swear that I'll never end my life with such a way. Okay, back to the main topic. Life has been so useless. And I am so not productive. My life is just around school and tuition. The rest of time, I spent it in front of my laptop. I know right, useless. And that's why my eyes ... Okay, don't talk about my eyes.
RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds. 4. Have Fun!!
SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
As If We Never Said Goodbye
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Bella Notte
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Won't Stop
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance With You
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Hero wtf -.-
WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
Shades
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Starstruck
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Your Guardian Angel
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
We'll Be Together
WHAT IS 2+2?
Songbird
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIENDS?
Don't Go Breaking My Heart
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Untouchable
WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Never Say Never
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Beth
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE AT YOUR WEDDING?
Anybody
WHAT SONG WILL PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Haunted
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Last Christmas
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Heaven
WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
Latin Girl
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Best Thing I Never Had
School has started for only three days, three bloody days if I may add. I am soooo fed up of everything, EVERYTHING, in that school. If you ask me to list it, I will list it for you. First of all, read this post : BULLSHIT AND PARTY: Fools With You . And then guess what, there is a new rule. We students are all not allowed to use or bring a phone with cameras aka conventional cellphone. See, how sad is that? I know you can now imagine how desperate I can be. Well, the other reason why I hate dislike the school because most of the teachers there SUCKS. Think about this, I should wake up every morning at 5.30 am to go to school. Well, that's still normal. The sad part is that I can easily fall asleep while the teacher was explaining. I mean, what's the point of talking to us student about sovereignty (I google translate it, seriously). Oh please, for God's sake it's the 21st century. You are really kidding me if you say you want to learn about those things in the books. Well, maybe there's some who wants to LEARN about those things. No offense.
Anywayyyy, take a look at this.
I really am not used to my new schedule. Everything is a mess. But I guess it's gonna be fine.
xx,
Little Lamb
p.s. I need a new haircut soon. I really look like an idiot.
First of all, school will start on Monday. I'm soo stressed right now. There's so many things stucked in my head and I don't know how to get it out of my head. Okay, I've got one problem. Sooooo, .........I think I won't be able to blog for a long time because:
1. school will start soon, which means I'll be really busy preparing this and that.
2. I went to an eye-doctor last Tuesday and guess what, my eyes' minus have raised as fast as a rocket. So I was forbidden to play computer, games, online, browsing, etcetcetcetc.
I'm so sorry. Thanks for reading this whole time..........
You've got that smile That only heaven can make I'll pray to God every day That you keep that smile
Yeah, you are my dream There's not a thing I won't do I'll give my life up for you Cause you are my dream
And baby, everything that I have is yours You will never go cold or hungry I'll be there when you're insecure Let you know that you're always lovely Girl, cause you are the only thing that I got right now
One day when the sky is fallin' I'll be standing right next to you Right next to you Nothing will ever come between us Cause I'll be standing right next to you Right next to you
If you had my child You would make my life complete Just to have your eyes on little me That'd be mine forever
And baby, everything that I have is yours You will never go cold or hungry I'll be there when you're insecure Let you know that you're always lovely Girl, cause you are the only thing that I got right now
One day when the sky is fallin' I'll be standing right next to you Right next to you Nothing will ever come between us I'll be standing right next to you Right next to you
We're made for one another Me and you And I have no fear I know we'll make it through
One day when the sky is fallin' I'll be standing right next to you
One day when the sky is fallin' I'll be standing right next to you Right next to you Nothing will ever come between us I'll be standing right next to you Right next to you
Oh, na na Stand by my side, side, side When the sky falls down I'll be there, I'll be there
You've got that smile That only heaven can make I pray to God every day To keep you forever
At this point, Justin Bieber and Chris Brown make me smile all night long!
