Oct 27, 2013

If I Die Young

Hello.

Isn't this little creature the cutest?



Visited this little coffee shop called Mixed Cafe.
And ps. my legs look really ... um terrifyingly huge but long (?) lol ok stop

I know you miss me. :p

I've finished my second monthly test and I'm pretty sure I failed all subjects, except for English, Mandarin and Bahasa. You know, I kinda regret taking science but now that I think of it, I will probably regret taking social class too as I don't like those Geography or Economics or Accounting or whatsoever related to the subjects (or not). I took science class because I know I don't like those social-based issues. But I don't like science subjects as well. It's just I find it hard to perceive even the most rudimentary thing about all those subjects.

Or maybe it's only a pretext that I made up, a plethora of alibis. Just because I'm too exhausted of all these pointless lessons that I'm sure I will not need.

So life has been exhausting as you know that I made an intrepid decision to teach. I found it hard at first as I did not have much experience about teaching other than teaching my friends or sisters. I was laconic at first, explaining grammar and reading texts briefly and explaining the meaning of hard words I don't know the bahasa by gesticulating wildly, hoping they would understand, whereas my students were reticent, as I was still a newbie there. Now I am always irate because now they are being so sluggish as they keep on talking to each other, or to me for that matter, badgering me with questions unrelated to the subject they're learning about. Often I need to cajole them into doing their work. Some of them are extremely adroit while some of them are just not so bright in English. Perhaps for some teachers it's hapless when you got those students under your watch ( actually it is too, for me ), but it's my job to enhance their basic skill of English. I am vigilant that I may seem like a wicked felon to them, but like all other teachers, I just want them to be able to use English properly. (hoek HAHA ok stop)

Guess what I just made a paragraph by using 15 from 20 vocabs that I should be learning as I will have a vocab review this Thursday. You might want to ignore some of the inappropriate usage of vocab as I place them very randomly all over the paragraph. Gosh I sound like a bitch.

Anyways, not that it's important but I have this weird thing that every time I want to talk about something I just can't get it out of my mind. And it's just stuck there. That's probably why I haven't felt like blogging this whole time. Also because I'm soooo tired of school and teaching and whatsoever torture I have in my current life. And oh, the damn short movie my friends and I made for our music class. Actually I made it and my friends acted in it. It took like a month but we didn't get a really satisfying score so it's like so very pointless that I want to stab the teacher's back with a knife. Wow okay that was something.

You're probably wondering where I have been. Well I've been preoccupied by these 3 guys (belle, cs, dro) who took most of my free time because they're just that awesome and fabulous and I love them and stuff oh whatever oh I mope. And hey, it's exactly a month since my last post. Typing feels weird. Yep.

And yes, this post is a very random one - I know that. But I've been crying my eyes out since yesterday because:
1. Bonnie's funeral or memorial is just so HEARTBREAKING. AND I HATE JEREMY FOR THAT.
2. FINN HUDSONNNNNNNNNNNNNN :'(
3. My life.
Now do you see why I've been grieving and crying and I just can't stop. It's really tiring to cry all day long and my eyes were swollen and got all puffy. Now I've got something to make you cry as well.

Now watch and weep. The first is Bonnie's memorial which happened to be so damn emotional that I cried right before I need to go to corpus yesterday. The second and the last are my favorite grieve songs now.

This one sucks. Check this one out instead. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGJV-dmLWNU&feature=youtube_gdata
This month has been hectic and tiring.
But as always, I know I'll be alright.
ps. Thanks to someone for always believing in me, even when I can't believe in myself anymore.
Till later
xx
ps. Happy early Halloween. #Spookytown #spookylife